Be cool, dude! Check out some of the other posts & you'll see it's going both ways.
I don't know how often you've been snubbed but you're not alone. There could be a number of legit reasons or excuses for this. Somebody once said to me, "man's rejection is God's protection". There are risks involved when you attempt to reach out to someone.
Just chill and don't give up. The Lord's convicted me about making sure that I respond to every e-mail because it does take a lot of courage to extend a hello. But that risk will produce a reward. You'll see.
Just a few days ago, I posted this very issue in the "Ask a Guy" section. My question is entitled "Do you read emails?" If you review my question, you will see that we're in the same boat and you are definitely not alone. (smile). Maybe you could even respond there to give your 2 cents.
As Singer1 stated above, you're not the only one in that boat. I also pointed out in my post that it's 'common courtesy.' If you wrote me, I would respond; it's 'common courtesy.' :glow: I see my post has received a lot of views but very few responses.....proving my (our) point once again.
I make it a point to reply to all messages even if it takes me a couple of days. I do it because I would like the same cortesy; however, I don't always receive it. I understand that it's sometimes it may seem easier to simply ignore a message from you someone you're not interested in rather than rejecting them. Absolutely loved singers comment that man's rejection is God's protection. Besides it just wasn't meant to be. Try to be too discouraged ...I think it's happened to all of us at some point.
Well...I guess that old saying of "What goes around comes around" is probably true. It's the same principle as "Do unto others..." You can't fix what someone else does but you can make sure you aren't following the same pattern. If someone doesn't email back do what Jesus recommended....."shake the dust off your shoes" and move on down the road..." ooh.....sounds like a song and a good one at that!!! Be Blessed and Happy Easter!
Okay, I'm the naughty one. I don't respond to all emails. There are conditions, that to me, warrant no response.
1.) You give me your phone number in the first email. Uh...nope.
2.) You give me your personal email or IM address in the first email - this screams SCAMMER.
2.) I get home, check my email and find four (or more) messages from you in the same day - when we have never to this point had any contact. To me, that says either stalker or controlling.
3.) You wink at me. I don't respond to winks. What does that mean? You like me? You thought my profile was amusing? You want to be friends? You have something stuck in your eye?
4.) You write something like "I'd like to get to know you better." Better stick in a more specific question - maybe that sounds really mean, but my profile has many things to comment on: I list self employed, but not what I do - I have a picture posted with a guy and have "If you want to know about this picture, ask me" written in my profile - these are both good ways to strike up a conversation. "I'd like to get to know you better" is generic and could possibly be a quick line that has also just been sent to 15 other women. I like to get the feeling that someone has actually read my profile before writing to me.
I guess I'm the odd duck. I would rather send a message to a guy and have him not respond at all, rather than have a collection of "After reading your profile, I don't think we'd be a good match" emails in my inbox. I think that would get discouraging after awhile. However, if I ask someone something SPECIFIC or Biblically related, then I think a response is in order (and vice versa.) Example would be: "What kind of dog is that in the picture you have posted?" If the guy writes back, "It's a schnauzer" with nothing following, then I know he has answered my question and is no longer interested in going on with the conversation. However, if he writes "It's a schauzer - are you an animal lover?" then he has asked me a question back to get the conversation going.
That was awesome! Guys could learn a lot from your post here!
I almost always feel compelled to reply to messages, but sometimes it is only out of a sense of duty.
I like getting winks just because they are fun and flirty, but I would much rather have a man send me a message. If guys send a message they would get more replies if they asked a question about our profile, or even just commented on a photo.
Another suggestion: Ask a question. It will really help get the ball rolling.
Some of the guys out there are doing a great job, but others of you really need to put a little more effort into your communications.
I do not answer every mail I receive. First of all it would take more time than I feel I have. Secondly, too many of the mails I receive don't merit a response in my opinion. Here's a cut and paste, with comments to each:
"Hi, how are you?" I'm sorry, but if that's all the effort you spend in making your first approach on a site like this, then you won't get a reply from me.
"wow your gorgeous!..sweden huh?" Ehhh...I dunno what to say about that one......but, I do expect guys to have a somewhat more intelligent approach than this when they contact me.
"so what time is it over there?" Where are you heading? Are you about to call a friend in Sweden and want to ask me about the time so you won't wake them up in the middle of the night? lol :)
"Subject: hello
Message: :laugh::laugh::laugh:" Well, I admit that this message did make me laugh.....but a reply? Sorry....
"hi how are you. x" Ohhh...I'm just fine. But I won't reply you...
"hello how are you doing?" See above line.
"I like you i really do!" Well, thanks! Now work on your approach before you write somebody else please.....
" if you like hot latin Chritian latinos lets chat some time. hahahaha j/k if I am your type spiritually and physically let's give it a try. God bless. Sincerely, xxxxxxxxx ROM 10: 9" Well...duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhh.......
"You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen." Lol...I actually did reply this one. But I know that there are women out there way prettier than me, and a message like that - as much as it CAN be considered a compliment - has way too much of "pickup line" written all over it. Surely the writer has seen prettier girls than me before, unless his name is Ray Charles or Stevie Wonder....
So, where am I heading with this? Let me put it this way: If you expect to get a reply, then make sure your first mail DESERVES a reply. Now don't call me rude, unfriendly or a primadonna for saying this, but seriously, this place is not the local bar and I do expect people to express real interest in me and who I am if I'm gonna reply them. That also means that if you obviously didn't read my profile and just sent me a random nothing, I most likely won't reply.
To the OP and those who support the "Reply all mails" idea, if that's your cup of tea then by all means, reply all mails! And God bless you for it! But if you make that a general rule that "girls that don't reply are rude", then my answer to that is "It depends". Because seriously, some letters merit a no reply. And whether you're a guy or a girl, you have to be aware of that. I'm not calling out guys with what I'm saying here - same goes for us girls. If we want a response, we better make sure we deserve one with how we approach that someone in our initial letter. As if I would EVER EVER EVER write a guy on this thing with an initial "Hey dude, whassup? Wanna be friends?" I expect the recipient in the other end to be intelligent enough to deserve better than that. And if he's not, I will already know from reading his profile and won't have to message him anyway :angel:
I agree, I have written seveal nice e-mails to men on this site and have gotten no reply. some have even deleted there profiles after i sent them e-mails. why not just write back and say thanks for the e-mail but i'm really not intersted in starting frienship with you. after all isn't that what this site is all about? meeting new people and making new friendships in hopes of finding a love connection?
I agree with everyone here - it's been rather frustrating for me; I mean - I'm a gentleman, I write instead of sending winks, but have yet to get a response; several of them haven't even been on line, so I guess they've split the joint. But it's really left me wondering "What, am I chopped liver?"
I mean, I took the time to actually write - ask questions, start a conversation - leave it open too. I'm up front about where I'm going yes, but I'm a "friends first" kind of guy. y'know'm'sayin'vern?
I joke about them not responding now, but , it's a little discouragin'.
