Author Thread: Beautiful Women
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Beautiful Women
Posted : 23 Jul, 2009 10:31 PM

It's very obvious after looking at some men's profiles that looks are very high at the top of the list for some if not most men. Attached on most profiles is something like this, "prefer a woman who stays fit", "I like a woman who takes care of herself", "a woman who is in shape". While some men may actually mean that, we women know that it's also code for not fat.



It's amazing to me the emphasis men put on a woman's looks. Most would say, oh, but men are just visual creatures. Really? Where in the Bible does God say that He made men to be more visual than women. Women can appreciate beauty just as much as men, and believe me we like to be married to or dating someone who looks amazing to us. But, I think the emphasis has been put too much by men on women's looks. It would try to put pressure on women to be or look a certain way. No woman wants to be married and feel like she has to look a certain way or maintain a certain weight. Yet that is the message some men would send or seem to send. What if women held you guys to such rigid expectations on your looks as you seem to do to us? As someone well put it on this site, some of you men want a filet mignon when you yourself are an uninspected butt end of pork.



Let me submit to you that if you will look at a women spiritually, and see her beautiful that way first, it will help the situation a lot and I believe you will even find her more beautiful physically if you'll do that. I believe a women's weight should be between her and the Lord. I'm not talking about being totally unhealthy, and I certainly think it is cool for a woman to be beautiful to her husband and appear beautifully for him. But if you will back off and let her weight be between her and God and take the pressure off her, you would probably be surprised how beautiful she would appear to you. If you give us freedom to be who God made us to be and be beautiful spiritually and physically and be natural, we would be happier to and more eager to dress well for you and present ourselves beautifully to you.



Just a tip.

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Beautiful Women
Posted : 24 Jul, 2009 08:49 PM

Very well said.



"some of you men want a filet mignon when you yourself are an uninspected butt end of pork"



I love that line!



I think being attracted is important. I respect the fact some men don't like "fat" women and are trying to say it in a nice way. When I read it in a profile, I never take offense... it is a big help to me in seeing who not to talk to.



I personally like a man with the looks that give him room to grow. What I mean by this is: If they are totally hot and nothing else to go with it, that gets boring fast. But, when I look at a man who has personality and substance... to me the more I get to know him, the better looking he gets.... that is my type of man!

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Beautiful Women
Posted : 25 Jul, 2009 09:30 AM

You just hit the nail on the head. You would stay away from that type of man. But your type of man would be one you found attractive after finding substance you liked. I think men put physical attraction very, very highly and women don't. The thing there is for the men to not put it in such a way that it hurts women or makes her feel like she has to look or weigh a certain way and for the women not to let any comments like that push them to look or weigh a certain way. What about the spiritual aspect? Most people graze over that, but it's the most important part. That's why I say, find a good, godly woman who you find attractive spiritually first, then let her physical beauty be the icing on the cake. Attraction is important, it's just not the most important thing and you may be ruling out godly, good ladies because you put such an apparent emphasis on it. Also, if fairness to the men, we should not dress inappropriately ever. Whether in public or on this site. And our pictures should be tasteful on here, which some are not. The camera should not be looking down at you as if you were trying to make some ungodly statement. Men are just as likely to rule us out if we do that nonsense, as we are if they seem too stuck on physical issues.



God bless!

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Beautiful Women
Posted : 25 Jul, 2009 09:59 AM

Prov. 31:30, "Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised."



Prov.11:22, "As a jewel of gold in a swine's snout, so is a fair woman which is without discretion."

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DontHitThatMark

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Beautiful Women
Posted : 26 Jul, 2009 08:33 AM

Hmm...I'm probably going to regret saying this out loud...but maybe we all should try looking for an equal. If it's possible to be "unequally yoked", maybe it's possible to be yoked equally. Don't ask me how to tell who is an equal, or what is a yoke though. I have no idea. Just a suggestion.

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Beautiful Women
Posted : 26 Jul, 2009 07:18 PM

When the Bible tells us to not be unequally yoked, it's talking about with unbelievers. 2 Cor,6:14, "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?"



In other words, we should not be so involved with unbelievers that they are pulling us away from Christ, rather than us pulling them to Christ. The yoke is talking about the yoke used for oxen actually, when people would plow and put a yoke on oxen. They would fit a yoke on the neck of oxen to bind them to the traces so they could draw the plough (Easton's 1897 Bible dictionary). In the verse above, the Strong's concordance gives the definition for yoke as "to yoke up differently" or "to associate discordantly". I think if the yoke was unequal one ox would be doing more than the other. You don't want an unbeliever pulling you away from the Lord. So, that's what it means spiritually.



I think you may be saying yoked physically here. Maybe? I don't think we have to find somebody exactly the same cuteness as us or who we find our physical equal. God will give you the desires of your heart. He can definitely help you marry up! I was just saying I think men in general put too much attention on physical aspects of a lady. Although I don't think every man on this site does that. It's a minority, I think. It's just not good for the woman to be looking at a profile and feel like she is inadequate or if she were to be involved with man in marriage it would be conditional on her keeping herself pretty or in shape. When you marry it should be for life and not conditional on weight, dress, shape, or looks for the husband or the wife.

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DontHitThatMark

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Beautiful Women
Posted : 27 Jul, 2009 12:31 PM

I've worked very hard to stay healthy/in shape, and I want to find someone that has worked as hard for me as I have for them. But let me clarify...if I found someone I couldn't live without, it wouldn't matter if she was overweight...or if it was obvious this girl was the one God chose for me, it wouldn't matter either. God will put her in my path if she's the one. But I guess my point is, boys AND girls....if you're not willing to work hard(I know it's not always possible) for your marriage partner...then don't expect a lot of guys/girls to look for you...and expecting them to look for you...is unreasonable.

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Posted : 27 Jul, 2009 05:02 PM

So, if you married someone and you for some reason stopped working so hard to please her or put on a few pounds and stopped working out, would she be justified in leaving you or treating you differently because you didn't "work so hard for her" anymore? Of course not. :) I'm just showing that if that is a condition which has to be met in order for someone to love or appreciate you it's out of line, guy or girl.

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DontHitThatMark

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Beautiful Women
Posted : 27 Jul, 2009 06:10 PM

I kinda look at it like this...if I started drinking and became an alcoholic, or if I started doing drugs...I would say, yes...she would have a right to treat me differently. Overeating is a bad habit, right? Food can be just like a drug, and just as addicting...if not more. You don't need drugs to live. You do need food. Can't escape it. So, barring the physical problems some people have, if I just started eating a lot and gaining a lot of weight, I would WANT my wife to worry/treat me differently. It's not good. Just like drugs aren't good. Hopefully she wouldn't stop loving me, hopefully she'd help me... I feel like I'm digging my own grave here...I should've never commented...this isn't the kind of stuff a single guy on a dating web site should be talking about. :dunce:



:stop:DISCLAIMER:stop: I'm not looking for a barbie!!



Here's a great exercise tip! Go onto a singles website! Start by getting all the women on the site mad at you...and presto! Who needs exercise when you're constantly running from mob of angry women with pitchforks and flaming torches?! Not me!:ribbit: Gotta run!:bouncy:

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Posted : 28 Jul, 2009 09:31 AM

I think you're saying from above that if we are not willing to keep ourselves in shape or work out, it is unreasonable to expect someone to look for us. Is that right? I totally disagree. Just because someone is not toned or in very good physical shape hardly disqualifies them from being worthy of finding someone. Why is that so high at the top of the list? Looks are not gonna sustain a marriage for anyone. That's why that verse says like a gold ring in a pig's snout is a woman without discretion. I am a nice looking lady. I want a husband that is nice looking to me. But that is not the most important thing. Why is it such a high requirement on the list for men, but spiritual readiness is not. I have to tell you, don't hit that mark not included, that many,many men on this website here do not list enough information about their spiritual life for a woman to make a good decision in even thinking about making contact. They tell their interests, and even include long lists about what they want in a woman, and then just say something like they go to church and read the Bible. That's it. Do they know that they are gonna have to be the spiritual head in that family? Are they growing spiritually? Do they know where they are going spiritually? I have to tell you that it's very disheartening to see everything else addressed and then some people just say, I believe in God or go to church, and some people tell you right off they don't even go to church. I'm just saying it's out of balance. Looks should be the icing on the cake. :) Do men really expect us to have a relationship with them when they don't seem prepared or they seem most concerned with our looks? As long as we look pretty doing it, huh? That's what's not reasonable. :)

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DontHitThatMark

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Posted : 28 Jul, 2009 10:16 AM

Ok, I guess I see your point. I don't look at a lot of men's profiles on here...so I wouldn't know. And I guess a lot of guys do make their lists...or...books. And I agree, it's unrealistic. I was just trying to give my point of view. I want to find someone like me. I'm not aiming for the stars. But because I'm looking for someone like me...it greatly narrows the type of girl I'm looking for. Is that wrong? I wasn't saying that you can't expect people to look for you...I was saying...expect people like you...to like you. Usually. There's always exceptions. But imagine a guy that's a hunter sends you a message...and you're an animal rights activist holding a bunny. Would you date that guy? Maybe you would...but I think a lot of people wouldn't. Just because he kills little animals and eats them. Is that wrong? Or are they so different that they wouldn't be happy together? Maybe a girl will read a guy's requirement list and say "Hey! Thats me!" and then they get married.



:peace::peace:

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