dear folks, i wonder why it is that theres so much predjudist against beautiful people here? i dont think ive ever seen so much envy and jealousy before. GOD made people the way they are.. they cant help that.. and shouldnt have to..
you know folks beautiful people can have beautiful hearts too .. and good charachter traits also.. they can love the LORD and be very spiritual too. and they can love another with as much heart as anyone else can.. .
so why is it we put them down so much?
i see it comin from the womenfolks moreso than you see it comin from the menfolks .
my question is why is it so? when it ought not be so..
now me , i aint no pretty thing hehe.. but ifn i was my feelins could of been hurt alot here by some of the talk here.. i dont know i just dont get it..
A woman who knows who she is in Christ is a beautiful confident woman.
A woman who doesn't know who she is in Christ is often insecure as she is measuring herself against the world. Insecure women do and say petty hurtful things. Let's lift up these sisters in prayer that they will know who they truly are in Christ.
I'm not really on here enough to see what is being referred to, but I understand what you are saying.
I think that women are intimidated by other women, more then men are intimidated by other men....especially in the "looks" department. And that can lead to jealousy. And just catty-ness in general.
When I was a more insecure person, I was more in the above category, until I realized that it was me that was having the problem. And I have a lot of beautiful friends who are amazing!!!!
On the other hand though, I think that men sometimes lead women to "fighting" because of their inability to keep their wandering eyes to their own women, if they are in a relationship. And of course, the media pressures women in ways that men can't understand.
Still, in it all, we should be loving towards others. God made each of us the way that we are. And what matters also is one's personality.
ole cattle, well, I have been MIA for a little while so I do not have context on this issue (too lazy to review the whole forum to figure it out). But personally, if I was 'hated on' because someone considered me beautiful, and NOT because I have exposed cleavage et al, then:
1) I will thank God for fulfilling scripture in my life - I am beautifully and wonderfully made!
2) I will rejoice! Beautiful is a relative word and the reaction to me simply would tell me I am MORE beautiful than them. Ha ha :). Think about it, if we were all 7 feet tall, would a 6 footer be 'tall'? Or does Warren Buffet call a �meager� wall street CEO �rich�? No. We see through the filter of relativity. We always do, no thanks to our competitive generation
3) I would feel sorry for them for not knowing who they are in Christ. Of course, I am beautiful. Aren�t I made after someone's image whose glory fills the temple? If I radiate even 0.000000001% of that glory, yeah, I am beautiful...
Sorry old man, don�t have the answer to your �why� question but some tips for anyone who may have been badmouthed.
Ok, I have to do this. Attractive people do NOT have it easy.
This is something I wrote to a potential girl freind some time ago, it deals with different types of attactions and such. as well as the difficulties attractive people face. it is enormousely long. I have to edit it so her name isnt in it anymore, but she is the only person who has read this, until now.
Here it is. And as you read this, this was my soul bleeding out for a gal who cannot trust men because she is so amazingly beautiful that she has been hunted by every guy she interacts with.
You go to an art show, and as you walk among the various paintings and exhibits, they are of all styles and eras. Eventually, you find your way to the very back wall of the showing area. Alone, there is this painting, unlike anything you have seen before. The owner considers it to be so precious that it is behind a thick glass case. It must be a priceless piece and you can see why, you simply can’t stop staring at it. The lines, the colors, the textures, all draw you in so deeply that it feels like the image is burning itself into your mind forever. This is piece art you would love to have for your own, you can close your eyes and still see it so clearly, it’s like it’s right there in front of you, to reach out and touch. By now, you have forgotten every other painting, statue, and work of art you passed earlier.
That’s what we look for in physical attraction.
There is a new hard cover book by your favorite author on the stand at the book store. You grab a copy and head home. Anticipating the book, you hurry through your day until you can cuddle up next to the fire place with a glass of Ornellaia Massetto Merlot and dig into the book. Within the first few pages, you are hooked. You cannot put it down, you keep reading until your eyes are barely open, the fire burns low, and you finally drift off to sleep. Each day, you sneak in a page here and a page there, until you can once again, relax and delve into the story once for hours on end. The book is captivating, and spell binding. You laugh, you cry, you can feel every word. Eventually, you finish the book, and you place it next to the others on your book shelf. The story is ingrained in your memory for a long time and you simply can’t wait for enough time to pass until you can pick it up and enjoy it once more.
That’s the ideal intellectual attraction.
It’s a late evening and you are down town Chicago, walking down North Western Ave. As you pass The Empty Bottle, you hear live music playing, and even from the outside, the music from inside immediately grabs your attention. You and your friend decide to pay the cover and check it out. You push your way through the small audience to be close to the stage. It’s a band you have never heard of, music you are unfamiliar with. But the song is absolutely amazing. The feeling in the vocalists melodies is incredible. The instruments intertwine into what seems to be the perfect combination of soul and angst. There should be blood on the stage for the amount of pain and betrayal the lyrics are portraying. The singers eyes are closed and he is in his own world. The song finishes, leaving you in a trance. Then they begin the next song, which is an upbeat number that you can’t help but begin to dance to. It fills you with joy, and such happiness that your earlier emphatic connection to the pain is forgotten. You bounce around, forgetful of all your troubles and sorrows while the band jumps around on stage and swings around wildly with instruments in hand. You are finally left breathless at the finale. Song after song, they carry you away to a new experience of emotion, unlike anything you have experienced in live music before. By the time the show closes, you have already forgotten what the band looks like or even their name. But you have been touched to the core of your heart and feel changed by the experience, satisfied and complete.
That’s the ideal emotional attraction.
On a cold day in winter, you are walking from your bed and breakfast in Ashland, New Hampshire, down to the local pub to grab a bite to eat with your lover. Things have been difficult lately, this was an attempt to patch things up by making one last attempt to get away and focus on one another, maybe for the last time. Just ahead is St. Agnes Church. The bells on the church strike noon as you draw closer. The evening was difficult, the conversations are forced, neither of you seem to be capable of the effort needed to make the changes you need to make to save your relationship. You draw closer and suddenly he stops, looks you in the eye, and says come with me Dear, I have an idea. He leads you up the icy steps, and opens one of the great doors for you to pass into the church. The light inside is low, the dim sunlight passing through the stained glass windows and one over head chandelier are the only illumination inside. He draws you to the front of the church while the snow coming off your shoes melts in your wake into the deep plush carpet.
At the front, near the alter is a good number of candelabras and benches with lit candles. He looks down into your eyes, you can see the desperation there, the hopelessness. He takes you gently by the elbow and draws you to the front pew and sits you down. He turns towards you and looks into your eyes. There is a tear running down his cheek. “I am sorry Baby, that I haven’t been the man I promised I would be, but I don’t know how much more I can take this” You’re eyes begin to glisten and the candles begin to shimmer through the tears forming. You just stare at one another, then you both look forward and see the beauty of this old church around you. You think of all the prayers, year after year, that have been offered here, the pain, the hope, the love, the joy and gratitude that have poured from peoples lips, right from the seat you are in.
A small demure little old man in robes passes from a curtain to the side of the alter. He looks at you both, then gently approaches. He can see the tears on both of your cheeks reflecting in the dancing candle light. Once he is in front of you, you can see the compassion, the love, the understanding in his eyes. His face is lined with the wrinkles of time and wisdom. He reaches out to both of you, slowly, hands out, palms up. You both feel the urge to place one of your hands into one of his. The diamond in your ring is catching rainbows from the bouncing light ahead of you. As the three of you stand there, unified by something greater then yourselves, something from above, from all around, he whispers one thing so quietly, you have to lean forward to hear him. “Love yet remains, Love never fails, go, and Love more…” He gives you a warm smile, turns away, and begins to attend to the candles on the alter.
You turn to one another and see something that was not there even moments ago, in each others eyes. The tides of healing have begun to wash away the failures of your pasts. You can sense the new determination in one another. You embrace, and for the first time in a very long time, you can feel one another. You have both been touched by the very source of Love, that which stands at the heart of all things right and good and true. You finally stand and make your way out of the church. Once you reach the outside, the clouds have disappeared, the sun is shining, and as you grasp one another’s hands and begin to walk down the street, in silence, for no words are necessary night now, the church bells strike 2 pm. And you smile.
That is spiritual attraction.
When two people first meet there really is no way to say where the road will lead for them. The initial attractions will vary, the intentions are not too clear. But as time passes, these attractions will wax and wane, they will come and go in varying degrees, or surpass one another in importance as the seasons pass. If a life time is to be had, it most certainly is not foreseeable in the beginning. But if a life time is to be had then one thing is certain, the painting may take on new meanings as your vantage point changes over time, you may need a new book from that author, the band will play new songs, and you will dance or cry, or sway in one another’s arms, but one thing is, and should always remain true “Love yet remains, Love never fails”
Years ago, my life brought me to the stage. (music) People on stage attract a great deal of attention and admiration. It heightens peoples attraction to you. Women will seek you who normally would walk past you on the street without a glance because you are *someone* up there on stage. In high school, forever ago, I was the best guitarist in the school by far, and I looked like I just walked off the stage with Bon Jovi. I was all about appearance and image. It got me a lot of attention, from all kinds of girls. If I had just cut my hair, wore glasses instead of contacts, put away the image I had so carefully put together for myself, I would have had a much smaller amount of admirers, many less to choose from, much less confusion. I knew nothing then about all the different levels of attraction, their importance, or the role they play in deciding on what would lead to *true love*
I am not a flatterer, I do not fawn over beauty. I very much appreciate it, but it’s not my fixation. It’s not my chief interest. Girl, you have had innumerable admirers because of the face you were blessed with. But beauty can be as much of a curse as it is a blessing. It draws ALL the attention, good and bad. And that is a difficult task to sort through an entire room of men who desire you because of how you *Look*. Which one is sincere? Which one of them is the one guy who is interested in ALL of me, not just the outside? You want to scream at the world, THERE IS MORE TO ME THEN THE OUTSIDE! You can give up, over time, and just learn to expect to be treated like a trophy, or you can pray you have the discernment and… well, luck to finally find someone who wants to dance to the band with you, someone who can’t put the book of who you are down, and will sit in the candle light with you when there is no hope, and find love again with you.
This is not a love letter, believe me, you would know a love letter, coming from me, if it was. This is a letter of encouragement and hope for you. I have learned to live a day at a time, to guard my heart, and to walk carefully, but after what you said to me about life being so full of pain on the road looking for love, that it seemed the only option was to give up, or keep trying and keep getting your heart broken, I feel much the same. But I know the right kind of attractions, the kind I am looking for, and will not settle for less then those. You’ll notice I said nothing about sexual attraction, it’s the thing I am the least interested in, prior to true commitment, because that is the easiest of them all to find, and to tire of.
Do with this what you will, I am hear to listen, and to learn about you, you intrigue me. I must say though, I have not communicated to anyone else like this in a long time. You draw this from me. I like that. But one day at a time, or none at all, as the future holds, is fine with me.
