Christian Chat Forums | To wait or not to wait..that is the ? - CDFF

Author	Thread: To wait or not to wait..that is the ?
momof3grownmen2022 View Profile History	To wait or not to wait..that is the ? Posted : 26 Apr, 2023 03:49 PM My ? Is as a Christian guy, do you get pressured by your peers to have sex without a commitment? If it's a weird question let me know that too and why. This inquiring mind wants to you..lol Post Reply
Moonlight7 View Profile History	To wait or not to wait..that is the ? Posted : 30 Apr, 2023 01:16 PM I'm a Woman. The original poster is divorced in her profile. It would be interesting her thoughts on this topic. Imo Seems most answering here has never married Yet . :⁠-⁠) Post Reply
CDFF21467^ View Profile History	To wait or not to wait..that is the ? Posted : 30 Apr, 2023 05:04 PM "The whole 'you have to test drive the person first to know if you have suitable chemistry' argument is really the outcome of being desensitised to immorality." it doesn't help ether that many christians are brought up to believe that even talking about things of a sexual nature is taboo. there's no reason (as far as I know) that a couple to be can't at least have a mature discussion about what they expect when married. Granted it's foolish to things will be once married if both partners save sex for marriage. Post Reply
NarnianGirl View Profile History	To wait or not to wait..that is the ? Posted : 30 Apr, 2023 05:20 PM What couples discuss beforehand, is up to them.. personally, I would find it off limits to go into any detailed descriptions of any sexual acts. The topic can be talked about discreetly and in good taste, such as where and how to spend the honey moon & the first night etc.. I would imagine that a couple is infatuated and intoxicated about one another, and looking forward to having some private and intimate time... but if something happens, and things don't go as planned, it's just a part of life anyway :-) At some point I would ask the other person 'On the scale of 1 to 10, how important would you consider sexual intimacy'.. but not until we already know each other well and know that there is that safe connection. Post Reply
Moonlight7 View Profile History	To wait or not to wait..that is the ? Posted : 30 Apr, 2023 06:14 PM CDFF That's a good Response! Some people are so reserved when it comes to discussing sex. Yet want marriage and relationships. Ask questions! Post Reply
NarnianGirl View Profile History	To wait or not to wait..that is the ? Posted : 1 May, 2023 06:59 AM RetroMillenial: Since you're into science and stuff, there was something I thought you'd be interested in. Since this is a dating site, and people can get spooked out by a message, I won't send it directly, but post it in the Science section :-) Anyone interested in science may find it fascinating too. Post Reply

RetroMillennial^ View Profile History	To wait or not to wait..that is the ? Posted : 1 May, 2023 04:25 PM I definitely understand your position, CDFF and agree with you on much of it. It's a tragic irony to me that on one side, there are even some church-going Christians that, like their secular counterparts, act like losing one's virginity before getting married is as inevitable as the sun coming up tomorrow, and on the other side we have so many churches that don't seem to even know what to do with single people. It's too bad, too. There's a real gap that I think the church could fill to give singles a safe venue in which to meet in person, date, and form relationships. NarnianGirl: Thank you for letting me know about it. I'll keep an eye out for it. You're welcome to message me directly about it too if you wish. I look through the science/philosophy forum from time to time, but I usually don't post anything there. For a field that is supposed to be impartial, science manages to stir up a lot of strong feelings that I don't always want to get in the middle of. Post Reply
NarnianGirl View Profile History	To wait or not to wait..that is the ? Posted : 1 May, 2023 06:23 PM OK, RM, I'll send you a reminder to look it up when I have posted.. Something you probably already are familiar with.. It's tragic that churches (in the West, anyway) don't really know how to encourage and help single Christians. Especially those, who have been living a sexually pure life and sought to be faithful to God, often for years, and still haven't found a spouse... It is as if churches prefer seeing those, who go from one marriage to the next, divorce after divorce... or have kids out of wedlock. Then you are seen as 'normal' That's something which has changed in the last twenty years or so. When I was young believer (early 90's) divorce and having kids out of wedlock were sins you needed grace for. Today, it is considered the norm, and being a long term single living a sexually pure life is seen as weird and odd... Post Reply
Alligator View Profile History	To wait or not to wait..that is the ? Posted : 2 May, 2023 10:02 AM Besides God wanting us to "save our bodies" for marriage, hasn't anyone here considered catching a STD? When you are dating someone whether they have been married before or not, you cannot believe everything they tell you --many facts need to be learned and shared. And that takes time. Are you ready to risk your health just to please the other person? That person might have one or more STD's. Are you willing to risk your physical and mental health? I am not. Post Reply
NarnianGirl View Profile History	To wait or not to wait..that is the ? Posted : 2 May, 2023 12:36 PM Alligator, 100%.. That's often forgotten..! All those 'feel good' hormones can give you a 'high', but they are not something that automatically give you a lasting relationship ... Emotional attachment, yes, and a lot of heartbreak - even when the clothes are still on... That's why I will not kiss or make out before it's official. The person can say all the right things, and still leave you bereft.. Post Reply
FDCWillard^ View Profile History	To wait or not to wait..that is the ? Posted : 4 May, 2023 12:10 PM There is a simple truth that many don't want to acknowledge. if you have a lot of extra marital sexual interaction your ability to imprint upon the person goes down because your brain gets wired to imprint upon the act itself. This leads to people having sex without intimacy... because they don't know how to be intimate and cannot figure it out any more. And that leads to frustration which leads to divorce. That is a primary practical reason to wait for marriage. Post Reply