Costly Expectations - What Have You Done for Me Lately?
Posted : 16 Feb, 2010 08:32 PM
Ok ladies, this is for us... but I'm sure the men will view this also. Again, went back into one of my books my Michelle Mckinney Hammond. This one "What to Do Until Love Finds You", she writes about costly expectations. This section called "What Have You done for Me Lately?" I extract from--
"What do you expect from the man in your life? He's not the only one who should gain from the relationship, you know. Partners should consider what they have to offer and what they stand to gain from a relationship - in that order. Christ laid down His life in order to gain us. This doesn't mean that you spill out all of those wonderful gifts in one overwhelming gush, nor does it mean you dole out generous heaps of wonderfulness on those who are not deserving...
God had decreed a list of responsibilities for men. They are responsible for their women spiritually and physically, to the point of being willing to lay down their lives? Once married, they are to care for their wives as if they were taking care of themselves. That means they should provide food and clothes, and take every precaution necessary to make sure she lives a safe and secure existence. But women's expectations, in light of present-day desperation, have been lowered and compromised.
Prospective husbands no longer have to court women, wine and dine them, or behave like gentlemen. Why? Because too many women are willing to fill in the blanks in the relationship themselves in order to have a man, all in the name of validation. It is a pathetic state of affairs. And yet many of these women still end up unfulfilled or repeatedly alone.... Remember, nothing won easily is appreciated for very long. When we have to pay a dear price for something or someone, we treasure it always."
I just wanted to share this because I can appreciate her words from my own life experience and having to evaluate again just who am I, what I really want, and consider my own expectations. Share, vent, express as you like.
Costly Expectations - What Have You Done for Me Lately?
Posted : 18 Feb, 2010 05:43 PM
Yes, Dgr.... Chocalate, chocalate.. if only??? :rolleyes:
Arch, thank you for your input... so very well stated, and much of what you said I should retain as spoken from a man of wisdom.
I can see, if I never take a stand for the qualities I say I personally look for in the man of my dreams, and never allow him to be challenged to be that, I guess I put him in a position where he might never try and, I'll never know the true potential that could have been in him. And, I certainly don't want to be the one in control. Thanks everyone... I'm enjoying reading and reflecting on your inputs.
Costly Expectations - What Have You Done for Me Lately?
Posted : 4 Sep, 2010 12:30 PM
GraceMae where in the Bible does it say men should provide food and clothes? To me this is just a case of woman not wanting to take responsibility for themselves.
Costly Expectations - What Have You Done for Me Lately?
Posted : 4 Mar, 2011 07:11 PM
Both men and woman should contribute to the relationship financially Yes the man is to lead but it is a partnership still It is not fair to the man to expect him to be the only one who contributes financially especially since not all men have high paying jobs.
Costly Expectations - What Have You Done for Me Lately?
Posted : 4 Mar, 2011 10:31 PM
Who's going to take care of the kids?
Who's going to clean the house?
Who's going to shop for grocery's?
Who's going to do repairs?
Who's going to handle the bills?
Who's going to cook?
If you want to have a real conversation, use real answers. Tell me how you really feel. But also consider the consequences of your opinions. Think about what would go more by the Biblical example we all have. Pray about it ask God to show you. I'm not saying women shouldn't work..I work and would still want to continue to do so, but I think it's the man's ultimate responsibility to assure his family is taken care of in the grand scheme of things.
Costly Expectations - What Have You Done for Me Lately?
Posted : 5 Mar, 2011 01:24 AM
Who's going to take care of the kids?
Who's going to clean the house?
Who's going to shop for grocery's?
Who's going to do repairs?
Who's going to handle the bills?
Who's going to cook?
If you want to have a real conversation, use real answers. Tell me how you really feel. But also consider the consequences of your opinions. Think about what would go more by the Biblical example we all have. Pray about it ask God to show you. I'm not saying women shouldn't work..I work and would still want to continue to do so, but I think it's the man's ultimate responsibility to assure his family is taken care of in the grand scheme of things.
You assume everyone wants kids. There are things called school and daycare plenty of families use them.
Most people can shop when they get off work.
The bills can be decided by the man and wife.
Whoever is the better cook can cook
What about guys who are close to God but happen to not have a high paying job? Should they just never date? Maybe God has a reason for them being at that job.
