it could destroy us if we let it do all the work...we would all become dumber, why bother? get a bot, get an app, neural net to figure what you want next, no need for learning.....Neo Luddites prefer to have their Pi and eat it. ...simplicity and limitation encourages ingenuity and growth...lack is the maternal identifier for invention..and as males we know, if the woman wants and nags, we have to, go, design, test, make.... With all our understanding, we are nothing without the needs of others...no man is an island, but when you have kids...you can dream of such a one...remote, deserted, a workshop, a store and prepacked meals...and the means to answer any question as quickly and as simply as we can...just leave us alone to get on with it..every man is a nerd, they just need a question, I just wish women would also do that, they have the ability, they just parcel out responsibilty as they run the house....LOL...not PC at all....probably why I'm tempted by the M1 mac.....
It all depends on how you define love, if it's the "rush" or "hormonal" thang! best to wait, until the confusion abates a little, as falling in love and being in love are 2 different things.
It also depends on how you express love, and how your personality works, there is no one fits all category in love, knowing yourself and how you are, "your ways", helps.
It kinda boils down to this, when the flush rush of falling in love has subsided, is the desire to be with that person still strong? if it's strong enough that you can weather long moments of silence and still be content in your heart, ie "FIXED", then the likelihood is that you are truly in love, but the reality is, it rarely happens that way....so in effect, it doesn't matter what I or anyone else says, because, only you know the moments and conversations that go on in your heart, and as much as we try, there is no perfect moment, as love rarely needs words. When we forcefully attach concepts and principles of our own, we defeat it, because love not only covers a multitude of sins, but is a language in and of it's own, mere human concepts are just a pale description of what love is, even the greatest poets only hint....
So? the answer? Love is patient, it is kind, it bears no records of wrongs...you know the scripture...Love can be likened to a lovesick puppy, it doesn't matter how much you push it away, it just loves, not in an overbearing or oppressive way, but is gentle, persistent, always looking for the best, often stern and corrective, that's when it feels a mess, but the fruit of it is, security and faith in the love that we give and recieve.. because that is what keeps us safe in our inner being, just knowing you are loved, can make you feel complete...
This is just an opinion of one who has known and lost love, made many mistakes, love is truly the unconditional surrender of self...not in the roll over and do what I say way, but in the heart, mind and reasoning of man and woman, for women, this can be the easiest or hardest thing, because you are hardwired to give and express love, but we men.... we work differently, that's why we don't do rom coms without complaint.
We men are more tactile, a slap on the backs for our male friends and a smack on the rear for the one who God sends, I know it is a coarse description, but the picture is true, men express emotion physically, so the next time a man grabs your forehead and plants a kiss...a strong emotional response was displayed...and if he wraps it up with humour...then he's covering himself, as he just revealed he has emotions too...and they were focussed on you...
Remember, is it just the rush, or a fixed desire that is settled and content? one of them, has clarity.......and don't go thinking we know what you mean, we are MEN! we express things differently...apparently....
I see an elephant in the room, the perspective of 18 is a cultural one, not a biblical one, bar mitzvah, bat mitzvah, 12-13, or puberty, that was when you were expected to work and ready yourself for marriage, ie build a house, which would take at least a year if you were strong, quick, had a good teacher, no famine, no family tragedies, no weddings to prep for...so usually 2 years, done by about 14-15 years old, you had to know how to build, repair and maintain....no building on credit then, save up or make it....by the time you were done, an approved workmen, all could see....and your marriage? probably arranged; love matches, they are a new thing for the most...sometimes even betrothed upon birth...sometimes before, "my first born son, I am due to get married, come let us make family ties!", so you see, when we look back in history or at other cultures, what we see as normal is not normailty, just a different society with different needs, with people growing up into adulthood at different rates, to them, we are very strange and child like...to us they grow quick and have no child hood, who is right or wrong? unfortunately we are blinded by our cultural norms...and even those can change within the span of our life...
in England at the age of seven you were sent out to work, that changed about 100 years ago, when I was a child, you could marry at 14, it was extremely rare, every society has it's norms...at 16 can vote, at 18 can drink, at 21 join a casino.....legally you just become a little more "Adult".
In reality you start to become an adult at the age of reason, about 7 or so, you begin to understand right from wrong, you begin to understand complex thought......all of a sudden, hard questions for mum and dad...yup you know they are growing up, they are adult in their thought, not able to fend for themselves yet, but they can think for themselves, so you ready them to go out the door...usually...18-21...cos school...hmmm...kids are a costly lot...shoulda sent em out to the field....to work...
We are in a western culture, the world is different in it's views of "AdultHood", it depends on whether a nation is small or large, if small...all hands on deck, if large? a little leisure instead, that is why in the west most people don't become adults until their 30's...if you live in the hills of afghanistan, or some "poor" rural backwater, becoming a man or woman is much younger than the in west, to feed a child and till a field is hard indeed, soon enough the child is at work in the field, by the time they hit 16, they are farmers, not average farmers, but the kind that can feed their families in the harshest of climates.
The question for me, is why do we allow our children to grow up unable to reason? for without reason, we remain a child.
My own personal perspective, is that most under 30's are still children, emotionally, in their reasoning, in their understanding of the world, understanding takes time, it is bought through trials, so if you only start work at 21, how long before you can have an understanding of the world of men? it usually takes 10 years...if you are quick, strong, have a good teacher....
The answer...ban video games and the internet for all under 21.....let them learn about reality imstead of remaining without reason in a virtual world....they'll be 50 before they grow up...
We the so called adults are responsible for the mess of emotionally fraught teenagers and twenty somethings that can't even connect with adult society without them feeling we have hurt their poor feelings...no reason...you are an adult when you can reason....so...a child until 30....biblically speaking I'm a good 18 years off...but then...I look outside my front door and think different...of course...I find quite a few exceptions to the rule..but still, it seems about right.
You are not celibate, you choose to be celibate, it is ongoing and will probably continue until you are married, it is a definition/description/, yet you are flesh, one is real, the other a concept. if you wrap difficulty up in an area of passion that is conceptualised, it becomes a sin of sorts, and you begin to rail, "why don't people understand?", men are not running from celibates, they run from pain, they have their own faults and difficulties holding them back, as do women, don't confuse the complexities of man with your own personal choice, because everybodies pain or joy was the result of someones choice...be thankful that God gave you enough grit to stick to your guns, that is admirable, a woman that can prove gerself honorable, is a woman indeed. But with every gift comes the flipside difficulties. An Administrator can be a tyrant, even though the gift was from God, God gives us humility in our gifts and grace in our failings, where we stand we fall, and where we fall we stand, welcome to the complexity of man....Even though you are rare...it is absolutely normal....nothing wrong, just don't attach a sticker to the heart of man...it'll probably be very wrong....just as is the heart...full of all sorts of bad stuff...so be sober in your understandings, don't allow your passion to ddominate the question, a little grace, a little slack...cos peeps got enough on their plates....
Some people believe that there is an official translation that all believers are to be reading.
Posted : 3 Oct, 2020 12:10 PM
I read the KJV, as it is the most accurate translation for the english tongue, however....the Hebrew language is gematrical, letters are numbers, so is english...but you have to go back a long way....point is, there can be no perfect translation...because we do not have a gematrical mindset or a close understanding of archaic Hebrew, however, scholars search and research and find new understanding all the time, does it affect the translation? rarely...but it does help to understand the premise of the word in it's context and also within the framework of the word, one teacher that comes to mind is Stephen Denoon of the Denoon institute, he translates from source and breaks down the construction of the individual word and how that relates to the passge under analysis, so whilst I may agree the KJV for the most part is accurate, I cannot agree that it is 100% as too much information is lost in translation, as a previous commenter wrote, the KJV strips out the names of God....
There are many ways to view a picture, to say all men are wrong or bad and it's all our fault reveals one thing....you have found hurt. Statistically speaking, I am the opposite of what you say, I was the victim of a wife, I know many men who were and are. Men in this day and age shy away from marriage because we suffer greatly where divorce and access to children are concerned.
Statistics...hmm...never rely on statistics, statistics are just a question personnified, you can ask any question and find support for that idea...statistically speaking, I should be dead and not alive, but then I am not a statistic, and neither was Jesus the Christ, he came to set you free from statistics, no longer a slave to circumstance or prevailing wind, he came to heal not only broken hearts, but also to heal wounded and broken minds, bitterness is a trap we all face when remembering pain, but remember this one thing, he died for victim and victor, conquered and conquerors, he died for all, not just those who feel their pain is greater by some statistical right, if we focus just on self we lose our sight, pray for those who have hurt you, retake the ground in your heart, don't give in to anything that feeds your wrath.
If all you do is rely on statistics, you nullify the Christ, are overcomers statistically the norm? should a believers life be anything other than an extraordinary testimony? don't be a statistic, be an overcomer.
Why "Christian" man think sex before marriage is OK?
Posted : 2 Oct, 2020 01:35 PM
all have fallen short, though you may be strong in one area, it is also your greatest weakness.
To frame this particular question as an expression of gender does not help, both men and women have needs in both the physical and spiritual, do not look on others weakness from a place of frustration or pride, they have to work it out themselves, your responsibility is to inform them in the most gracious and compassionate way, where you are strong help the weak, where you are weak, you will find strength.
