Author	Thread: Sex before marriage?
Admin	Sex before marriage? Posted : 27 Oct, 2013 12:29 AM We all know what's the correct course of action for a christian. That being said, it's so much easier for a woman than for a man. Also, once you get to a point, you automatically will feel physically attracted to each other, and have urges. I'm not here to listen to someone lecturing me bible, or what in their mind is the correct way of action... I'm talking about real life. Men and women all over the world get this physical attraction for each other, that's like a magnet, once they are in motion towards each other, they accelerate at an enormous rapid rate until they clash and stick together. And so I'd like to discuss, not the coolheaded situation where we all have control over, but the moments where we feel like we've met the right person, we're getting engaged, we're at the point where we trust each other, love each other, butterflies in the stomach, and physical attraction is there! Those who've never been married before, or who are virgins may not understand what I'm talking about. I'm talking about the weeks before marriage. And once a man has experienced it, it's so difficult to go back to abstinence. So all of this, to ask our ladies in the forums, those who have enjoyed sharing their complete selves with that other person, How do you feel when you've been given a second chance, and have the chance to do it all over again? You are sure, deep in your heart that this next person is going to be the one where you will be spending at least many years of your life with. Things have just been right. God blessed it, you love him, he loves you, you've been faithful through the 4 seasons, and there's this connection, this attraction, this desire for physical intimacy. And the question is, what if you knew that for reasons (financial, family wise, career or study wise, or other), you know you won't be able to marry for at least 4 months, but you also know you won't be able to wait? I don't know about ladies, but us men are more urgent in this matter... Just probing, open for ladies thoughts here :) Post Reply
View Profile History	Sex before marriage? Posted : 27 Oct, 2013 01:46 AM You have to love the Lord and his will more than yourself and more than the person you love. It will be hard, but if you truly want to do what is right then one will find a way. Allowance for sin, or creating situations for sin isn't a mistake or an accident. If ye love me, keep my commandments. - John 14:15 Post Reply
View Profile History	Sex before marriage? Posted : 27 Oct, 2013 01:59 AM It is also always important to remember that it is the enemy that tells us we can't do something, that we're not strong enough. If I was courting a man and I was having trouble wanting to stay pure for marriage I would want him to be strong, be my rock. Tell me "We've gotten this far in the Lord, let's go the rest of the way." The man is stronger than the woman, therefore he would lead and protect what he has, allowing sin into your life can destroy you, your marriage, your whole life. The purpose of Christ was to deliver us from these sins. I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. - Philippians 4:13 Post Reply
View Profile History	Sex before marriage? Posted : 27 Oct, 2013 02:19 AM While I'm at it...I might ask, why not just move the wedding up and have the celebration later? If the couple have to choose between sinning to wait for their dream wedding or obeying the Lord, why not just go to the nearest small chapel and ask the pastor to marry them there? But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn. - 1 Corinthians 7:9 Paul says right here that it's actually far better to marry than to have sex before marriage. Post Reply
1jon310 View Profile History	Sex before marriage? Posted : 27 Oct, 2013 12:01 PM When I attended a divorce recovery group the speaker had a wise thing for us. Before you are married (or give away your virginity) kissing is just making out. After we have crossed that line it becomes foreplay. This is a sibling in Christ. If we truly Love (agape) them then we will put them first and as men be leaders and be concerned for their Holiness before God. If we are not concerned for them enough to protect them from ourselves then we are not good enough for someone who is a daughter of the King. Look up the Virgin Lips Movement on the net. Look at it this way... if a person cannot control themselves before marriage then they are unlikely to control themselves within the marriage by not sleeping around. Self control is part of the fruit of the Holy Spirit. Love and HONOR should start before the marriage not after the vows are taken. Post Reply
mcubed View Profile History	Sex before marriage? Posted : 27 Oct, 2013 04:40 PM "it's so much easier for a woman than for a man." Where do men get their egos�lo I was a woman married for over 10 years just stop having non-sin sex (no matter what gender) and see how easy it is. Oh ah I was divorced on April 4 so my sex drive stopped Aril 4... lol� we are wired differently but not that differently�. When a woman obeys G-d it is by the same grace of G-d as a man. He in His G-d like way removes that or suppresses that desire. No. I would not wait 4 mo�. I think it takes 6mo.to a year for �all� of a �real� person to come out when dating. so my opinion 4mo. is too short� however Paul said if they burn with lust they should marry so they do not sin�. Post Reply
1jon310 View Profile History	Sex before marriage? Posted : 27 Oct, 2013 04:50 PM Good point Mcubed The modern experts tell us that men are at their sexual peak when they are in their late teens to midtwenties and women are at their peak from midforties to midfifties. To think that I have a greater burden to carry then anybody else is self pity and prideful. At the very least a lack of empathy. Post Reply
View Profile History	Sex before marriage? Posted : 27 Oct, 2013 07:25 PM Well, the gentleman and lady said it better. Post Reply
Cat4Christ777 View Profile History	Sex before marriage? Posted : 29 Oct, 2013 10:50 PM MeeLee1980, Regardless of your physical "urges," if you claim to love your partner, then you should exercise as much self-control as necessary to ensure you respect her heart by marrying her BEFORE consumating your desire. If you are not strong enough in the Lord to do so, then do it for the sake of the fact that studies show having sex before marriage can doom the marriage. And God will give you all the strength you need to resist your earthly desires--if you ask Him. So, I guess you need to ask yourself: Do you actually love her, or do you just want to use her body for sex? That's what it boils down to, brother. I hope you make right decision. God bless, --Cat Post Reply
Testing1976 View Profile History	Sex before marriage? Posted : 30 Oct, 2013 01:49 PM I actually have a serious question, I'm not trying to be funny. Where does it state in the bible that you cannot have sex before marriage? I'm not talking about sleeping around, I am talking about when you have sex with one person and one person only that you love? Post Reply
View Profile History	Sex before marriage? Posted : 30 Oct, 2013 03:42 PM I think marriage, as it was in the Bible, is wholly different to what it is today. I'd go for a church wedding before God and witnesses, but not the civil part that makes it 'legal' as the state and I differ on what constitutes a marriage, how it can be ended and who is eligible. Post Reply

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