......maybe a little controversial, but here it goes......I've noticed in reading varies profiles here, and on other sites for that matter, that many of the brothers either drink socially or take 1 or 2 on occasion.
This is not to say that on profiles of sisters, that they too don't indulge. My question, which will obviously go for both genders, but right now I'm addressing my sisters........could this be something you'd compromise on? I ask because personally I've noticed that a lot of brothers who may view my profile and I in turn view theirs, they either drink socially, or on occasion. I, by choice, don't drink or smoke and that's something I just can't compromise on.
Ironically when I view these profiles, a large number of these brothers really have so many other qualities I do admire in a man.....it's just a little frustration! I can't help but wonder if amongst those few who had sooooooo many other qualities I admire, that there might have been just one who........well you guys know where I'm going with this, still knowing that who God has for me, is for me..........I just had to ask(smile)!
JUST TO NOTE***In God's Word, there are so many verses dealing with the consequences of "strong drink", in Proverbs especially, that I really didn't want to go there, but again I know this subject is sensitive to many and my intentions is NOT to offend anyone.....I just want to have a healthy, adult discussion......be blessed!
"It is written" trumps "personal feelings" every time. Why should a believer condemn or dismiss another believer who has a drink socially when the Bible expressly tells us that Jesus drank socially? One can certainly have personal preferences on any number of things but they should not try to claim that their preference is based on the Bible when the Bible clearly teaches otherwise. This lays unnecessary burdens on fellow believers. It's most commonly known as "legalism"
No disagreements here that the Bible trumps personal feelings. I believe that my Sister is not asking about what is permitted within scripture, she is asking about a standard for men to meet for her to consider them for marriage not if they are going to hell for having a drink. Most people have some standards that are not in the bible. Muscular, they have a job, physically active, bookworm, etc...... the list is long. This isn't legalistic unless a person is basing their salvation on it. She isn't. Let God tell her how to identify the correct spouse the He has chosen for her. May the Lord bring Unity to us . r
If we are believers, our "standards" should be based on the Scriptures not on our own personal preferences. Where there is a command, we need to be obedient to that command. Where there is liberty, we should grant and promote that liberty. Not only does the Bible grant liberty to drink alcohol, but we also see examples of Jesus doing it as I have already shown. Further, we have the explicit command to do so in remembrance of Him. So, in reality some of our sister's thinking needs to be corrected on this issue.
"After the same manner also he took the cup, when he had supped, saying, This cup is the new testament in my blood: this do ye, as oft as ye drink it, in remembrance of me" 1 Cor. 11:25
8 Thus saith the Lord, As the NEW WINE is found in the cluster, and one saith, Destroy it not; for a blessing is in it: so will I do for my servants' sakes, that I may not destroy them all.
You really need to learn that when the Bible mentions wine, it is talking about two things. New wine, aka grape juice, and old wine, aka booze.
There are only three allowed times in the Bible to drink 'old wine". For thy stomach's sake, for infirmities, and if you are facing death.
The Bible warns over and over about drinking and drunkards.
Luke 5:37-39
37 And no man putteth new wine into old bottles; else the new wine will burst the bottles, and be spilled, and the bottles shall perish.
38 But new wine must be put into new bottles; and both are preserved.
39 No man also having drunk old wine straightway desireth new: for he saith, The old is better.
Why not put new wine in old bottles? Because the new wine is unfermented, the old bottles contain the yeast from the old wine, and will burst the old bottles.
Since you mentioned the miracle of turning water into wine, I present this site and quote:
"I certainly would not want my children to get their first taste of alcohol at the family meal; nor would I want them to get it at church. One or more of them could well be potential alcoholics. As evidence that this is possible, we should consider that some denominations which serve alcoholic wine in their religious services also operate homes for alcoholic priests!
But we can be absolutely sure that Christ did not come to cause others to stumble!
The eighth reason: John 2, the miracle of turning water into wine, does not require that it be alcoholic. Many insist that it was, on the basis of verse 10, which says, "Every man at the beginning doth set forth good wine; and when men have well drunk, then that which is worse; but thou hast kept the good wine until now." They would say that, in those days, it was common to serve the best alcoholic wine at first, saving the worst until later, when men's tastes have been dulled by much drinking. But the point is just the opposite here! These people could definitely recognize that the wine which Jesus made was much better than what they had been served at first. This could not have been possible if they were already well on their way to becoming intoxicated! The fact is, neither the wine which they had at first, nor that which Christ made, was alcoholic.
Reason nine is found in the same passage: the Lord Jesus Christ would not have gotten glory from making drunk people drunker. Verse 11 is most important when it states that, by this miracle, Jesus "manifested forth his glory." Verse 10 indicates that the people had drunk quite a bit of whatever kind of wine they were drinking. If it had been alcoholic, they would have been intoxicated, or nearly so. Had Christ made alcoholic wine, He would have made drunk people drunker, or almost-drunk people completely drunk! Such a deed would certainly not have manifested any glory to Him!
This chapter also gives us the tenth reason: making drunk people drunker would not have caused his disciples to believe more strongly on him, yet verse 11 says that, as a result of what He did in turning the water into wine, "his disciples believed on him." Jn. 1:41 shows that they had already believed on Him as Messiah; this was a deepening of their faith and a proof that they had not been wrong. Would making drunk people drunker inspire such faith? The opposite would be likely! They were not looking for a Messiah who would pass out free booze! Thus, because of the description of this miracle and its result, we can not conclude otherwise than that this wine was non-alcoholic.
In closing, we must consider two things. One passage, we have already seen. Ro. 14:21 clearly teaches that Christians should totally abstain, the reason being that it is good "neither to eat flesh, nor to drink wine, nor any thing whereby thy brother stumbleth, or is offended, or is made weak." We have already seen that people may be potential alcoholics. By the social drinking of alcohol, one might encourage a person to start drinking, who would not be able to stop."
HJMP. If you do not believe in drinking alcohol, you do not have to talk to someone who does. This can cause dissension and anger. If you do not believe in "social drinking", it is best to avoid people who do.
If you do not believe in "eating meat", you do not have to talk to someone who does. This can cause dissension and anger. If you do not believe in "eating meat", it is best to avoid people who do.
Ok, Ok please folks.....exhale! This was exactly why when I posted this thread I strongly stressed that this was NOT to be taken personally and that as adults, I wanted to believe that we could all have an open and respectful dialogue. 1jon310 hit a point that I want to expand on and please hear my heart folks.........
I PERSONALLY needed to understand where my own standards were on this.....yes Biblically I know what The Lord expects from me as His own......period! But when it now comes to finding a mate, well a large part of who I am will have to be considered in that decision! Who the Lord has made me to be and of course who He is in my life will ultimately help make the best decision for me! I thank everyone for their passion and conviction regarding this thread, but as 1jon310 ended his last response(I might be paraphrasing): May we all be united in Him! May we all be continually blessed and kept in Him in our quest for true enduring and long lasting companionship!
Sometimes we overlook somethings in relationships and these things course problems in relationships later.And i believe its not good to compromise and think you can change the person coz most of the time it doesn't work.
Think of it this way,you are going out with a guy,and you meet with his friends and coz he drinks socially he goes drinking(something that you don't like at all),how will your relationship be with the guy after that?
I don't know whether am making sense but i believe in going for what makes you comfortable.
I'm not a girl, but I do have experience with this issue, both my previous and my current girlfriend drink. I do not drink, but I don't think there's anything "wrong" with temperate drinking, and I do not think that it's something to press on another person as long as they aren't abusing the drug.
IF they do abuse it, for example, getting drunk to the point where they shouldn't drive, or where their judgment is impaired, I consider that extremely dangerous and unwise, even apart from biblical condemnation. I would worry about her safety, alcohol is a lot like a time bomb that has no visible clock, it might go off now, it might go off later, it might never go off. People who are drunk do not have self-control, they may do or say things that they would never normally do, and can cause serious problems in their lives and the lives of those who surround them. For myself, I will not drink because I see the evils that alcohol use/abuse brings to the world, and I will abstain because I wouldn't want anyone to follow my example and fall into abuse because they aren't as "temperate" as I might be. Just drinking socially and having it around can be dangerous as well, all it takes is a little stress and a little depression and a little alcohol, and lives are destroyed forever by a few impaired choices. Alcohol kills more people than anything else in America, personally, it's something I don't need, don't like, and it's easy for me to avoid.
I have to defend Jesus a bit too, the "wine" that they used then can't really be compared to what we have now.
