Author	Thread: First date topics
Admin	First date topics Posted : 17 Oct, 2010 07:34 PM First: What questions would you like for a guys to ask you on the first date? What are some of the things that you wished guys would ask you about? Second (The easier part): What questions do you not want to hear on the first date? What do you not want a guy to ask you about? Post Reply
bcpianogal View Profile History	First date topics Posted : 17 Oct, 2010 07:56 PM "First: What questions would you like for a guys to ask you on the first date? What are some of the things that you wished guys would ask you about?" I like for a guy to ask me about my job, my family, my church, my pets, my hobbies, etc. Things that are fairly easy to answer, and fairly non-threatening. At the same time, if he will listen, ask questions about my answers, and answer his own questions, we'll learn a lot about each other. "Second (The easier part): What questions do you not want to hear on the first date? What do you not want a guy to ask you about?" I don't like for a guy to interrogate me about my faith or spiritual walk, ask me about my past relationships (well, just one at this point), ask me about my salary or financial situation, ask how my father died, ask me about my health history, ask me how I feel about such-and-such sexual topic, or ask very personal questions. A good rule might be that he shouldn't ask me about anything that he would be uncomfortable answering himself on a first date. Obviously, there is a time and place for the more personal questions...but not on the first date. Post Reply
bcpianogal View Profile History	First date topics Posted : 17 Oct, 2010 08:00 PM OK, I rethought this one: "ask how my father died"...as long as he asks out of genuine concern it would be ok. If he's just being nosey or morbid, or is trying to pry other personal information from me, I wouldn't appreciate it. I would probably offer the basics ("My dad died of a massive heart attack when I was 12") when I was telling about my family anyway, so any further details could wait until later. Post Reply
View Profile History	First date topics Posted : 18 Oct, 2010 12:57 AM Well, I would be quite nervous on a first date, so he'd do well to start off with asking questions about fun, silly, mindless things. He'd hopefully be able to tell when I start getting relaxed and could ask some more personal things then. He could ask me almost anything really. I'm pretty open. I probably wouldn't agree to go on a date with a guy in the first place if I wasn't comfortable being open w/ him. There are very few topics that are off-limits w/ me. As far as what not to talk about, I wouldn't really want him to bring up sexual topics or finances. As long as he would keep the conversation clean and not be nosy, things would be fine. Like BC said, if someone asks something out of genuine concern, that fine. But, if I start to feel like I'm being interrogated or like he's being nosy, then I'm probably going to start giving vague answers or trying to cut the conversation/date short. I guess that maybe I also wouldn't want him to ask me for a lot of details on things. Like, if he knows that I was sexually abused, I wouldn't be real comfortable with him asking details about that on a first date. I would probably want to talk about it all at some point because sometimes I just need to talk things out in regards to all that, but the first date isn't the time for that. Sometimes, I'm not that comfortable talking about my family either. We have some issues and I don't always really want to explain everything. I have to be in the right mood to talk about my family in depth. With any of these things, though, the guy really just needs to be sensitive. If I start giving vague answers, then that's a good sign that he's probably asked something he shouldn't have, and he can simply just steer the conversation in another direction. Unless he just asks something completely inappropriate, I'm not likely to hold it against him. Post Reply
DEEDEE72 View Profile History	First date topics Posted : 18 Oct, 2010 04:57 AM One thing to remember is to ask questions and follow up questions. If someone you met online reread her profile to get some good questions to ask. If someone from church is she involved in any specific ministries. You can ask her what made her decide on that ministry. Also, she probably changed a few times or bought a new outfit to impress you. It would not hurt to make a compliment about some aspect of her outfit. You look really nice in red. I like your blouse. (This is also pretty tricky...she does not want to know you are giving her a compliment that you would give your grand mother, staying too safe) On the same token stay away from talking about yourself the whole night and giving her compliments every two seconds. Don't ask her 'so tell me about yourself' ask specific questions. Or telling her she looks sexy...I am sure you know this stuff Cobbler :glow: Post Reply
View Profile History	First date topics Posted : 18 Oct, 2010 06:13 AM I don't want to feel interrogated or feel like I am in a job interview. Questions that showed he was interested in me and read my profile would be the best. Chit-chat. It would have to be a good exchange -- I would want from him as much as I gave about myself. Post Reply
View Profile History	First date topics Posted : 18 Oct, 2010 04:38 PM On first, or second dates, I'd rather it be an activity so I don't feel like I have to come up with two hours with of fabulous questions over a meal. Or coffee even.Very high pressure for me. Doing a fun activity gives great fodder to talk about, and you find out alot just be reactions to things or the conversation that stems from things going on around you. Meet at a pond by a hospital and walk around - ducks can lead to interesting conversations. :) and it's nice and public. festivals maybe. Lots of fall festivals going on around now. Post Reply
cowgirl1984 View Profile History	First date topics Posted : 18 Oct, 2010 11:35 PM Seems like everyone else has pretty much covered #2 (hmm, would that make me 6 years old again if I comment on that?) Things I WOULD like to be asked would be my pets, sports, sci-fi/fantasy, things like that. Basically just more detail about my interests I guess? I think generally for me sports is a good topic because it's something most guys can talk about and enjoy and I LOVE sports. But then, I'm pretty sure that answer does NOT apply to most women :laugh: Post Reply
View Profile History	First date topics Posted : 19 Oct, 2010 06:03 PM ask about things they like. But don't ask them what they like. Find out from the profile and previous conversations or forum threads. That shows you took time to find out what we liked. And vice versa. Hopefully that leads to more conversation about how they got started in whatever that is. Or a funny story that happened recently that has to do with whatever that is. Post Reply
marikashome View Profile History	First date topics Posted : 20 Oct, 2010 01:37 PM I'd want to go to someplace where no questions had to be thought out in advance-I'd rather just have fun on the first couple of dates getting to know the person. I read a person better from their character and interactions than questions and answers. Post Reply