Author	Thread: Weddings: who pays?
bcpianogal View Profile History	Weddings: who pays? Posted : 2 Jan, 2011 07:11 PM OK, so "traditionally" it would seem that the bride's parents are expected to pay for the wedding. In years past, girls often married young, focused on homemaking skills rather than a career, and had very little money with which to pay for a wedding. However, in this modern era women are marrying later, focusing on their careers and bringing home a decent income, and tending to move away from home and live out on their own. My question to you ladies is, has the expectation for "who pays" changed with the times? Who is planning to pay for your wedding? And guys (since I know you are probably going to answer anyway!), is there ever a situation where you would want to help out with wedding costs? I know that "traditionally" your parents pay for the rehearsal dinner...has that changed in any way? And for both guys and girls, does your age and/or life situation have anything to do with your answer to "who pays"? Personally, I plan to pay for my own wedding (if that day ever comes). My mom doesn't have a lot of money to spend on her three daughters' weddings, and I have a full-time job. Why shouldn't I pay for my own wedding? I've been saving up for it for about a year now, and have enough tucked away for a nice little ceremony and reception. If my groom wanted to help pay for things, I sure wouldn't refuse his help...but I wouldn't expect it. Post Reply
View Profile History	Weddings: who pays? Posted : 2 Jan, 2011 07:22 PM At this stage of life (nearly forty, with a full-time job myself and retired parents), I plan on paying for my wedding. Well, ideally, my husband and I would pay for it together. It will be small and simple, as I have children and refuse to have a lavish, expensive ceremony that would take food off their table. But if I were twenty years younger and it were my first wedding? I'd probably still pay for it myself, as my parents never had money to spare. With my first wedding, we got a lot of things for free - as wedding gifts. A friend of my mother-in-law's did cake decorating, so she did the cakes as our gift. The photographer friend 'donated' his time and gave us the prints at his cost. I went to Hobby Lobby and made my and the bridesmaids' silk bouquets myself. So it is possible to be thrifty on a wedding. But not free. (Though that's my goal for the next one - a simple, outdoor affair with a barbecue afterward.) Post Reply
bcpianogal View Profile History	Weddings: who pays? Posted : 2 Jan, 2011 07:28 PM Thanks for answering ML! By the way, girls, I'm not at ALL trying to say that your parents should or shouldn't pay...I'm just trying to get an idea of what is commonly expected by the people on this forum. I'm just curious! Post Reply
Elisa View Profile History	Weddings: who pays? Posted : 3 Jan, 2011 04:31 AM Hi there, Interesting question. Hmmmm. Before I graduated from college, my parents would have paid. Knowing my mom, and our financial circumstances, she would have helped make it as nice as possible, but the whole thing would have cost way under a thousand dollars. Today, with my mother retired and widowed, I would ask for her help, but not financially. She has finite funds and has given me a career. Her part there is done. If we stayed home for a traditional wedding, I would expect the traditional rules to apply. However, if we decided to travel somewhere, the groom will be helping out. Post Reply
View Profile History	Weddings: who pays? Posted : 3 Jan, 2011 06:23 AM For my wedding (25+ years ago) my parents paid. There was never any question of them doing this - I was in my early 20's and recently out of the house. Now? I expect my future husband and I (God willing, if this ever happens) will pay for the whole thing ourselves. Post Reply
View Profile History	Weddings: who pays? Posted : 3 Jan, 2011 06:35 AM I am pretty sure that my mom will pay for anything I ask for, but I don't want to go that way. I think I want to pay for my own wedding. Post Reply
View Profile History	Weddings: who pays? Posted : 3 Jan, 2011 04:07 PM I plan on paying for mine myself - flying to vegas baby! I don't know what I'd want to do for a wedding; maybe just a small thing at church. My folks already paid for me a decent wedding (mom paid for wedding dress, dad paid for reception, had the ceremony in dad's backyard), I wouldn't expect them to do a second one. My sister (29yo)'s boyfriend asked her to marry him recently so me and my mom are making plans and gonna be paying for it between me and her. They don't have too much extra money anyway, so even though we haven't discussed $ officially, me and mom have pretty much decided it that way :) Her dad doesn't have too much to do with things, so I doubt he'll contribute, but I was never too privy to who pays for what... Good question BC! I need to research this. Post Reply
MargoSolo View Profile History	Weddings: who pays? Posted : 3 Jan, 2011 07:59 PM No question about it. I would expect that me and my husband to be (Lord willing), will pay for the wedding. Being who they are, my parents will offer the little they can. I can't accept it. At their age, I'd just like them to be around to witness it. Post Reply
View Profile History	Weddings: who pays? Posted : 3 Jan, 2011 08:35 PM No rich heiress's here, duh, what did I expect from a free dating site. I tried to sign up on the "Dating for Millionaires" site, but after listing my income they wouldn't let me participate. That's Ok, cause we all got the same Daddy and He will help out with the wedding, cause he owns the cattle on a thousand hills! Btw, At my age I would expect to chip in, but that isn't saying much cause I'm cheap....lol! Post Reply
DontHitThatMark View Profile History	Weddings: who pays? Posted : 4 Jan, 2011 10:33 AM Meh....tradition...doesn't matter to me. I would feel better if the two individuals getting married paid for the wedding themselves, or at least tried to...maybe with some assistance from whichever parents wanted to. I don't really like the idea of any kind of traditional obligation from outside parties though. Feels selfish or something. "Hey, we're getting married. Pay for it." :peace::peace: Post Reply
Elisa View Profile History	Weddings: who pays? Posted : 4 Jan, 2011 04:27 PM Awww, now Mark, the bridezillas are just demanding their due and their right to have the perfect wedding, down to the platinum tipped petunias. Post Reply

First

Page : 1 2

Next  8 >>

Last