Christian Chat Forums | Why do people want only text-dating? - CDFF

Author	Thread: Why do people want only text-dating?
Admin	Why do people want only text-dating? Posted : 25 Jul, 2017 06:38 AM I don't get it. A guy shows interest, he asks you what you would prefer in dating, you tell him. Then when you hold his feet to the fire, he only wants to text you. Not talk on the phone. Not meet and greet. What happened to the normal way of doing things? Now I know that online dating is a modern phenomena, but there's got to be a few people left that know what "making an effort" means! Post Reply
View Profile History	Why do people want only text-dating? Posted : 25 Jul, 2017 07:58 AM Three options, either they are scammers, they are bad over the phone (I stutter like a blathering idiot sometimes when I try to make both my mind and my mouth work at the same time... it's a uncomfortable and embarissing effect) or they do it in an attempt to take things slow... from personal experience text-only cuts down on mixed signals being interpreted too strongly, one party (woman) sends strong "I like you" signals, the other party(man) responds enthusiastically, the first party gets scared that the second party is "moving too fast" even though it only followed the flow of things as indicated to it.... woman in general seem completely blind to how they act initially (apparently random displays of "take me now" & "I'll call the cops" at the same time) and how completely it can confuse men. If he's looking at you with bewilderment on his face.... he probebly IS bewildered because what you say and do don't match at all. Post Reply
View Profile History	Why do people want only text-dating? Posted : 25 Jul, 2017 10:13 AM Then why did courtship go so much better back in the day people had no technology? I'm not saying go without technology but I can NEVER figure out what people are truly saying through texting. Post Reply
View Profile History	Why do people want only text-dating? Posted : 25 Jul, 2017 12:30 PM Did it really? In the "old days" people were mostly just trying to survive, the men then paraded their prospects before the woman and eventually one said yes... The whole dynamic changed during the last century with each generation expecting more advanced courtship than their parents had to wade through. It went from "how good a house will we get" to "how good does our taste in music and politics match"... where before the man was the head and the woman the neck that turned it (ingeniously subversive) each party now has to argue with the other about what is right for them... life is annoyingly complex these days yes but the old days weren't always so much better either. Like I said, sometimes text-only seems easier or at least less messy... everyone does not always have the emotional energy to keep gambling with their feelings but they feel the need to keep trying anyway... and maybe I'm projecting but still. It IS a gamble because you never actually know if the other person is actually willing to give a serious go at it or just wants to kill time and have someone(anyone) for a while. The annoying thing is that kind of person will flatly deny that that is what he/she is doing... Or it could just be that he is a scammer or wants to keep things cool so he has a easy exit out of it because he doubts it will actually go somewhere or something. Post Reply
View Profile History	Why do people want only text-dating? Posted : 28 Jul, 2017 12:32 AM Personally, I like to get to know someone online before I go on a first date. I don't want to take the effort to see someone if I don't know if she likes me or not. If I Know that she likes me and she knows that I like her, then the time is right to see each other. Until then it's too early. People can talk on Skype or phone or whatever, and that usually reveals if there's any attraction. If two people don't click on Skype, they will not in person either. So, I like to save myself from unnecessary dates. One time my friend set me up for a blind date. Within the first 5 minutes, I could tell that we might not be a good match. And I was right. She felt it too. But we did spend about an hour talking just because to be courteous. It was a waste of time. She was a nice person, but we had completely different beliefs. On the other hand, if you're getting to know each other online, you can find out a lot more in less time. For example, looking at someone's Facebook profile, you can find out more about a person than you could by talking to them for 3 hours. Post Reply
View Profile History	Why do people want only text-dating? Posted : 4 Aug, 2017 06:26 PM True! :thumbsup: Post Reply

View Profile History	Why do people want only text-dating? Posted : 2 Sep, 2017 09:49 PM I am guilty of the texting thing for now. When you say something you can't take it back. If you type it you can read it and delete something that doesn't sound right. In conversations there are dead spots also so 2 people are on the phone and neither it talking..ouch! This especially pertains to me because I haven't dated or talked to woman in over 7 years. I am just getting my life back together... I have never video chatted but I'm willing to try if my 3 piece suit still fits me..... Post Reply
Jayzeee View Profile History	Why do people want only text-dating? Posted : 29 Sep, 2017 12:16 PM If i'm getting to know someone I like to hear their voice & I want to see their face. Text messaging is for sending a quick message I don't think it's an acceptable way to try to get to know someone unless you happen to be a teenager... Post Reply
View Profile History	Why do people want only text-dating? Posted : 23 Nov, 2017 02:48 AM I think many times it's because -- and forgive me if this is an over-generalization -- people of the current age are too emotionally weak, a.k.a. terrified, to make REAL human connections. I've had a few women online admit as much to me. I DESPISE this. I frequent chat sites. In the late 90s, I actually managed a few dates and eventually met my late wife that way. Today? Getting someone to talk to you outside the chat room is next to impossible. Probably 1% of the women I've spoken to have been willing to do that. Those few times someone was willing to exchange contact info, the vast majority of times, they just started flaking out. Either I send off bad signals no one's telling me about, or there is something seriously wrong with them. Could be that terror of social situations I mentioned, or just good old fashioned flakiness. Whatever the case, most people seem to want to live in a fantasy world -- where human relationships are manageable. You get bored or lose interest? Drop the hint of not initiating contact anymore -- what I call "poofing". Or better yet, just block them. Problem solved! Post Reply
Ocean17 View Profile History	Why do people want only text-dating? Posted : 23 Nov, 2017 05:59 PM Jayzee I agree with you. Texting is fine for a while. If you are both interested in each other enough, then the next step is to talk live, then meet in person. Each in it's own time but if you never take the chance (safety always comes first ladies and gents), you will wonder is that the one who got away? Afterall, what are we here for but to meet someone special? Post Reply
View Profile History	Why do people want only text-dating? Posted : 26 Nov, 2017 03:43 PM Because they are using a person to 'shoot the breeze'...time-wasters. This is a DATING site. If one plays their game, then they have the patsy to use when they are bored or as a 2nd choice, just in case who they REALLY wanna go after doesn't call (or care). Sooo, what do I do? I choose to NOT waste time with them or allow them to use me. A person is either 'the One'...or in the way of the One. Post Reply