Author Thread: what I cannot stand about guys on here
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what I cannot stand about guys on here
Posted : 29 Dec, 2009 11:13 AM

here's what I can't stand about the guys on here that claim to be christians and that won't hurt you or break your heart and especially guys that want you to move to be close to them and right before you do they decide oh its not gonna workout and I think we should just be friends when from the get go they promise to not hurt you and treat you the way you should be treated and the guys on here who are looking for young women who are virgins but, I'm sorry in this day and age not every christian woman has stayed pure but wish she had and for those guys who refuse to get to know you because your not a virgin, you could be missing out on a great, godly, christian young woman. And I can't stand guys who say I will love you and care about you for who you are but as you open up to them and let them get to know you, they turn on you and just want to be your friend, maybe this is wrong of me and other women to feel this way but, its something I felt I had to get off my chest, I'm sorry if this comes across as an insult, I'm not insulting anyone, I'm just stating what's on my mind as a young christian women who are tired of the guys that are out there that claim to be christians but yet treat women like they are something that can be used and thrown away whenever they feel like it.

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what I cannot stand about guys on here
Posted : 29 Dec, 2009 02:58 PM

Disappointment does seem to reign supreme in this vale of tears. I've been disappointed, and I've disappointed others as well.



A friend reminded me the other day of a book you may find helpful called "Happiness is an Inside Job". I believe the author is someone named Powell.



My dear Michael, in his chemical dependency groups, would look at a particularly hurting participant and say to that person "All you need to be happy is sitting right there in the chair where you are seated."



How true, especially as the Spirit dwells within.



Courage and peace to you this eve!



P

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what I cannot stand about guys on here
Posted : 29 Dec, 2009 03:47 PM

hey p, thanks, I really appreciate the encouragement :)

Signed, Bonnie

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raqsz

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what I cannot stand about guys on here
Posted : 30 Dec, 2009 03:51 AM

Hi Bonnie..........



Don't be disappointed on how men reacts on this site........Wait for God's perfect timing and you will be able to meet the right person who will accept you for who you are ..........you are a pretty lady and still young so don�t be in a hurry�� better to wait for that person who will be with you forever rather than a person who will only spend a few years with you and everything is over. The hardest part is the waiting time but God is just polishing our patience and I know things will be perfect for you and your soon to be husband ....... God bless you my pretty sister in Chrsit��



Racquel:angel:

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what I cannot stand about guys on here
Posted : 30 Dec, 2009 05:36 AM

hey, thanks for the encouragement, its much needed, I just don't understand how guys on here can call themselves christians but yet treat young women like they do, it just frustrates me when a guy thinks he is way better than you and because your life isn't perfect he decides well there's no way it would work and no way I would ever want to be with you, guys if yall are really truly christians, then, you will love and respect and care about us women how we deserved to be and you will treat us with the upmost love like christ does. So you christian guys out there that think that your above a woman, look at your life and see how you have probably messed up as well. Young christian women do not deserve to be used and thrown away or played with back and fourth in a relationship.

Signed, Bonnie

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GraceMae

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what I cannot stand about guys on here
Posted : 30 Dec, 2009 08:03 AM

macgirl,



Don't be disappointed. Just take note, make the necessary observations, and review the lessons from the experience of relationship with that person. It takes a whole lotta risk in exposing your heart and being transparent with another. And as we do, sometimes people are going to be receptive to us, some not, and some will just doggone flat out lie to us, play us like a string guitar, then trade us for the next new thing on the market.



You have to be ready for that. You be strong. Don't be bitter, and don't be mad. Put on your spiritual eyes and be ready next time. Be the lady that you are, and be none less than truthful at all times. God will not let you be hurt if you do your part. Just, as scripture says, "Guard your heart with all dliegence, for out of it come the issues of life".



Just ask God, each time you meet someone new, to use you in it to glorify Him. Mind you, that might not mean that this relationship will result in marraige but maybe you were a messenger from God to make a difference in a mans life, OR a man was being sent your way to make a difference in your life. And one day, God will bring you your perfect mate, there will be no "sorrow" in that which God gives you.



I'm excited for you girl!! Be in anticipation!



GraceMae

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what I cannot stand about guys on here
Posted : 30 Dec, 2009 08:16 AM

thanks gracemae, I appreciate it :)

Signed, Bonnie

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what I cannot stand about guys on here
Posted : 30 Dec, 2009 02:13 PM

Bonnie,



I feel responsible for what you have gone through being that I am a man and I could also be accused of such behavior.



I came on this site with the expressed purposed of finding a wife. I told God to open doors for me or close them. I told Him I would be open to whomever He seleccted for me. I then went about writing to whomever I was attracted to and seeing where it went. I tried to be as genuine and as sincere as I could be. It was a process that took some time and phone calls and letters, but I really feel that I have found the woman God wants for me.

Will there be hurt feelings by those that I was speaking to and writing to...maybe, but it was not my intentions -- at least I hope I did not come across as misleading to them -- but I may have.

We place so much Hope and Expectations on those that we meet -- that we somtimes set ourselves up for a big fall (I am guilty of this). I am also guilty of transfering my own dreams and desires onto the person I am writing to -- seeing them as what I want them to be...as what I Dream them to be...as what Our Future could be together.



So I want to Publicly appologize to you and to anyone else I may have caused any pain to because of my headfirst rush into happiness.

Bonnie, we are not perfect and some of us are even more imperfect and this is most likely not the last time you will be hurt by a man, but consider this....you will one day find that man that is perfect for you and all this will be forgotten.

Forgive him...forgive me...pray for me.





Peace

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what I cannot stand about guys on here
Posted : 30 Dec, 2009 03:07 PM

thanks for that wonderful note, and I appreciate it, I know one day I will find the right man that God does intend for me :)

Signed, Bonnie p.s., I'm sorry for my venting and if it came across as insulting that wasn't my intention, just alot of frustration

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what I cannot stand about guys on here
Posted : 30 Dec, 2009 04:31 PM

One thing you should remember is be positive.When I was young I got mad at women because I felt the same way as you.To word your thread as you did will be a turn off to most guys.

You should have asked for prayer in finding the right guy. and also ask for a positive response.Ask the guys to visit or give you ideas about your profile.

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what I cannot stand about guys on here
Posted : 30 Dec, 2009 05:42 PM

wow ok, I did not deserve that kind of response, if you don't have a positive or understanding response than please don't respond, I wasn't looking for a response really, I just wanted to leave a vent post.

Signed, Bonnie

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