Hey "don'thitthatmark" I'm gonna call you dhtm (an acronym for "don't hit that mark" which just takes waaay too long to write out.
:excited:
I really like what you wrote - you are obviously a super nice guy;
1) do not descredit yourself
2) understand what arrogance/pride/humility are.
You see, I had destroyed myself when I walked away from the Lord years back; I also destroyed my value in Christ; self-inflicted wounds. As a result, I struggled for years with understanding what humility/pride and value were. I was at a major ministry in Texas years back, so I went around and asked a whole pile of people "What is pride?"
They all agreed that it was the opposite of humility, but nobody could give me a definition of what humility was.
In the end, it was a man who had struggled with thinking TOO MUCH of himself who gave me the answer.
He said "Most people struggled with self esteem, they think lowly of themselves; I was the exact opposite. I thought I was the cats meow - I was the greatest thing on planet earth.
BOTH are a form of pride."
Humility is *seeing yourself the way God sees you.* You ever notice how much the Lord tells you and encourages you, in love, of the good things you are/do?
Yes, he points out your faults, failings, and need for repentence, but even that is in incredible love.
What I am saying is that if a girl likes you, and wants you - then do not assume that there is perhaps someone better for her than you. I have done this repeatedly - to the point where it would interfere with my even approaching a lady.
I had friends correct me and tell me to stop down-grading myself; that I "was a great catch."
If you have good qualities, it is in all humility, and proper honesty, to acknowledge them.
I would repeat those words to you here now, for this future time when your story may happen in real life. It would appear by your writings that there's a lot there that ladies would like (I know, I know, I'm not a lady - I'm just guessing here, okay? (grin)); that doesn't mean it'll be recognized, and it doesn't mean that you're compatible with every girl (you'll find out your incompatible with more than those you're compatible with), but that does not take away from your being "a great catch" for some lucky lady.
"I find too many men on here are wanting other than pure christ filled relationships and wanting to taste the fields than find their one and only who God prepared for them."
What exactly do you mean? I know you mentioned that some of the guys were asking you for nude pics, but has there been that many? Is that what you're referring to? Saddens me, I'm sorry to hear that.
Why does is it seem to be hard for a man to be interested in lady with children?
Posted : 5 Jul, 2009 11:32 AM
Hey Sweet,
I'm sorry to hear about that. While children don't scare me off, I am trying to avoid a lady with children - IF their father is still alive. If she's a widow, then there's no problem.
I dated a single mom of three kids, from three different fathers. It was the only serious realationship I ever had, and it was a blessing in many ways. However, I am avoiding that this go around becuse marriage is tough enough as it is; I look around, and I'm frankly intimidated by the amount of divorce and break up I see all around me. My bride and I are going to have enough challenges as it is, so I'm avoiding it because that just adds a whole ball of wax to the mix, having to deal with the father of your stepchild. And all of the problems that come associated with a broken family - or in many cases, just a child that was born out of wedlock, as was the case with my former girlfriend.
But actually, while I think children may scare some men off, I don't think it scares most off. I'm not your usual case in that I've never been married or had children of my own. I think if a guy has had children already, it would change things for him.
