Author Thread: Separated?
musician47

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Separated?
Posted : 7 Jun, 2022 01:29 PM

I've had two today, message me who, under marital status, are "separated". To me that says they are still legally married. If they got me to the altar, then that would constitute bigamy. I can accept divorced, and of course single or widowed, but will not communicate with a married lady, thank you! ....Wow...

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Jayzeee

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Separated?
Posted : 7 Jun, 2022 02:56 PM

When I see a profile that says separated I assume that they’re one of those people who can’t be by themselves…

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AngelsandAirwaves^

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Separated?
Posted : 8 Jun, 2022 09:53 PM

Oh my goodness, I've been saying this same thing! It's really odd because I've seen it a lot on here...and the individual would be saying they were in the process of a divorce...to me I stay far away from that situation.... I feel like if I was in that situation the last thing I would want to do is be opening myself up to the possibility of another partner at that moment. I'd be seeking God for some guidance and healing and help to get through that situation in my life.

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Caleb90

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Separated?
Posted : 25 Jun, 2022 02:05 AM

Some times a divorce proceeding can drag on for a long time. If someone is honest that they're separated and finalizing their divorce, I wouldn't mind chatting--first as friends and then developing steadily into something more serious when/if we both so desire. Of course, marriage is out of the question until the divorce is finalized.

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thismindbeinyou2

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Separated?
Posted : 12 Jul, 2022 10:32 PM

I am not a lawyer..but legally separated does not always mean that they are still married..I think that it depends upon which state that they are in..to know their real marital status ..I think that you can trust them to tell you the truth..about the truth of their current status..within their state..other than that..you are free to talk anyone that you wish to speak to..as long as it is safe to do so..because the separated husband may be mad that his former wife has a new friend & may resent you if you are in contact with her..but on the other hand... he may be happy that she is developing new friends...even new men friends..and

especially new Christian friends..

especially if you are making her life fulfilling & happy & interesting..some women will keep who their men friends are asecret from their husbands if there

are the jealous type & their marriage is still strongly attached ..but if there I a separation...where the husband is no longer interested in his wife's affection..because of diabetes & low testosterone..they may live in the same house & be friendly & may attend the

auto racing events together..if he spends all of his time fixing up hot rods..for friends..but she may feel totally separated because of his lack of interest in her otherwise..in a sexual or romantic way..so your friendship may fill that void perfectly..without your being anything other than her best friend..there is nothing wrong with that..you can lead both her& her husband to christ..if you wish..plus all of her friends also...the Bible is full of such relationships..you may want to open it up and look again.

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Moonlight7

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Separated?
Posted : 13 Jul, 2022 04:35 AM

Thismindbeinyou

That was a very good response!👍

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Chioniso

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Separated?
Posted : 15 Aug, 2022 06:04 AM

Separation means one is still attached. I dont waste my time. God forbids.

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Chioniso

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Separated?
Posted : 15 Aug, 2022 06:04 AM

Separation means one is still attached. I dont waste my time. God forbids.

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joesomebody6^

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Separated?
Posted : 19 Aug, 2022 02:29 PM

divorced=separated witch also = married. Divorce is not legitimate in the eyes of the lord. You would be partaking in a affair if you dated such a person. Remember it’s till death do we part and fie better or worse.

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NarnianGirl

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Separated?
Posted : 1 Sep, 2022 10:35 AM

There is a well known and well-reputed dating website which I won't mention.. but, they list under their options 'Separated'.

I made a profile there last year, and the only matches I got, were under that *Separated' category... and needless to say, that did not gain my trust.

I even wrote to the customer service, and they just gave me the generic 'oh this is a legal category' type of explanation...

It's really disappointing, when a 'Christian' web site allows that..

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MountainsNCougars

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Separated?
Posted : 3 Sep, 2022 02:02 AM

Wow wow wow!!! This is an appalling thread to read, especially on a “Christian “ dating site!! So much for the Bible and it’s teaching about NOT judging others…. Unbelievable!! Just because someone puts separated on their profile gives you the right to treat them like this? Where I live, unless you can prove verbal abuse, physical abuse, sexual abuse or attempted murder there are requirements to have so many years of a legal separation prior to being able to even apply for divorce. I do not think it is very CHRISTIAN to paint every separated person as “ unable to be alone”, that they are dragging other/outside people into a battle as that is a pretty harsh judgement on a wide group of people. Everything takes time, sometimes a divorce, the paper side of the end of a marriage, cannot happen as quick as some would like. Let’s not forget that to get a divorce will cost money, money to get legal representation, money for court costs and more money for more costs so that adds to even more time for that to happen. Even uncontested, amicable divorces take time to happen. We’d all love to be able to say we never had our marriage end/fail/ but in today’s JUDGMENTAL world that is not the case. Nobody marries and thinks geez I will divorce in 3-5 years. Divorce is a very difficult, humiliating situation to be in, especially as a Christian!! It’s tough to put yourself out there on a dating site, show your vulnerabilities of your personal character then find you are being judged by “CHRISTIAN “ people for your title of separation, is it better to lie, bend the truth, misstate the situation, give half truth’s?? I am sure each separated person has/had a heartbreaking or horrible reason that their marriage ended and despite your degrading comments, we are not all looking to drag people into our divorce situation but instead tried to heal, to let God heal us more and are picking up our pieces to rebuild our life. I can only speak for myself but I married my husband because I loved him wholeheartedly, I only saw him in a group of a hundred men, I did anything he asked and more, I was a dutiful wife and I even told him that if he married me I would never divorce him as I believed in marriage, I believed in our marriage being blessed and that it would never end however it turned out that I was alone in those beliefs as my husband up and moved out of our home, cut all my brake lines to kill me yet still I loved him and cried every night and prayed for our marriage. It’s been over 6 years since I last talked to him and I have been healing, praying, growing, learning and overcoming my shame in my marriage ending. I’m still not divorced and to be honest I don’t want to give him a divorce as he completely broke me emotionally, financially and physically, he will get his divorce eventually as our system grants after so many years of no contact however it is not my place to JUDGE OR PUNISH him. I did not take heed that he has done this to many, many women plus 3 other wives and unfortunately I am just another notch in a long stick of betrayal.

Even now I am moving slow into any relationship ( friendship incl).. I don’t want to burden anyone with my past hardships as that wouldn’t be fair but do I have to stay alone, isolated and ostracized because my marriage ended?

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